Living life unapologetically as a Black woman with Crohn’s disease

August 3, 2020August 11, 2020Leave a comment

When Melodie Blackwell was initially diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in October 2018, she felt alone. Not because of how isolating IBD can be, but because she couldn’t find many people who were speaking about their journey from the perspective of what it’s like to be a Black or Brown woman in the IBD community. JPixStudio-8924 copy

“When I looked for information from the IBD organizations, I felt like there was little to no one who looked like me. Sometimes, and history shows this, we can’t be unapologetic about being a person of color. We must tell our stories in a way that seems more digestible to White America. When I started sharing my journey, I wanted to reach those in the minority community from various walks of life who felt isolated or alone, to let them know they weren’t by themselves and there is a space where they belong. With my non-profit Color of Crohn’s and Chronic Illness (COCCI), I believe that’s what I have been able to do,” says Melodie.

Dealing with feeling “uninvited”

As a wife, mom, entrepreneur, Black woman, and Crohn’s warrior; Melodie’s view of the IBD community has multiple perspectives. At this time, inclusion and diversity isn’t one that’s at the top of the list. “In order for any organization to be inclusive, they have to have to have a deeper understanding of a community. And when it comes to those who are in the Black community, most people don’t go where they don’t feel invited. Where does that thought process come from? Let’s talk about history and “whites only” venues, seating on the back of the bus, segregation ending less than 100 years ago, and the Tuskegee Experiment to name a few things. Many of us still have family members who can discuss all of the aforementioned like it happened yesterday.”

When it comes to Melodie’s thoughts on not feeling invited, “I am fine with that, because personally, I go where I am not invited. Not having an invitation doesn’t mean that I don’t belong. But as a culture, that’s not a resounding thought process. I know that that can seem odd, it’s a systemic issue. If you don’t know the culture, cultural differences, and historical oppression, you won’t understand that. There are some deeply rooted healthcare adversities – they live on today.”

Leading up to her diagnosis and even today, Melodie has dealt with ignorant physicians along the way. Her Crohn’s presented differently than most. It started with random body parts swelling. She had a doctor tell her she just needed to “squeeze those parts to help the blood flow”. She’s had doctors display their implicit bias and not listen…which resulted in abscesses bursting in her colon and emergency surgery.

Health equity isn’t given, it’s fought for

It’s the inequity that has inspired Melodie to go above and beyond and amplify her voice to show others they can do the same. She launched Color of Crohn’s and Chronic Illness (COCCI) to help lift people up and let them know they aren’t alone and they didn’t choose the challenges before them. She’s received countless messages from people embarrassed about their symptoms. Melodie is driven to show there’s no reason to feel ashamed about your IBD and she’s focused on creating a space that feels safe to get answers and receive help physically and mentally.

“I want to empower people of color and beyond, to take control of their healthcare and not feel like they are a victim. I want them to have the resources that they need. I want COCCI to be readily available to help them find doctors, learn more about healthcare, provide a safe space to express their thoughts, help them advocate/lobby for their needs – I want health equity and to decrease the undeniable disparities in this community.”

Don’t be afraid to live

As an IBD mom and patient advocate, Melodie’s main advice is to live. IBD and chronic illness causes all of us to make changes and adjustments throughout the process, but we are still here, and we still can have full lives.

“Some days will be tougher than others, but a mindset that says, “I choose Life” every single day, will change your life in the absolute best way,” says Melodie. “You set your limitations, and you determine your victories; don’t let IBD take that away from you.”

You can follow Melodie and COCCI on Instagram:

@melodienblackwell

@colorofcci

Check out her website

5-ASA’s aren’t approved to treat Crohn’s—So Why are Hundreds of Thousands of Patients on Them?

October 21, 2019October 18, 2019Leave a comment

When I was initially diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in 2005, I went home from the hospital on 22 pills a day. As the weeks passed and the steroid was tapered, that pill count dwindled to six. Six Asacol. For those who don’t know what Asacol is, it’s considered a 5-ASA medication. Chances are, if you have IBD, you’ve either been on or are currently taking this as part of your daily treatment regimen. Out of the approximately 1.6 million Americans who have IBD, more than 250,000 are currently on this type of medication. That may seem all fine and dandy, but did you know 5-ASA’s are not FDA approved for Crohn’s patients?

Yes, you read that correctly. As a Crohn’s patient myself, I spent three years on Asacol and from 2014 until just recently I was on Lialda (mesalamine). After seeing a discussion on Twitter led by Dr. Peter Higgins, M.D., Ph.D., M.Sc., questioning the use of this class of drug for Crohn’s, the topic piqued my interest. Here’s what Dr. Higgins has to say about the subject.

NH: Given that there’s no evidence that 5-ASA medications are beneficial to Crohn’s patients (and not FDA approved), why are they being prescribed to more than 250,000 patients?

Dr. Higgins: “As best I can tell, this is because of failure of medical education, too many doctors getting their drug information from drug reps, and doctors fearing the risks of getting sued for using effective drugs. It’s uncommon for doctors to get sued for under-treatment of Crohn’s disease, which may need to change for doctors to change their behavior. Some doctors could be using 5-ASA’s as a placebo, and surprisingly, some doctors might not really understand the difference between Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis in terms of 5-ASA response.”

NH: Is there any additional benefit if a patient takes a 5-ASA med along with their biologic?

Dr. Higgins: “For small bowel Crohn’s, definitely not. Also, a recent study for ulcerative colitis showed no additional benefit for patients on biologics to continue 5-ASAs.”

NH: As someone with Crohn’s disease in my small bowel, I’ve been told in the past by a GI that 5-ASA’s lower my risk of colon cancer, thoughts?

Dr Higgins: “Anything that reduces colon inflammation will reduce the risk of colon cancer in IBD. Generally, patients with milder ulcerative colitis end up on 5-ASA, and therefore have lower risk of colorectal cancer (because of less disease activity, not necessarily the drug). There’s a correlation, but probably not causation. Studies show the most important predictor is control of inflammation, rather than what drug you are on, for preventing colorectal cancer in ulcerative colitis (or Crohn’s colitis).”

NH: As far as the cost for the patient, insurance companies, healthcare system in general—is this more about business/making money than treating the disease?

Dr. Higgins: “For the manufacturers of 5-ASAs, this is about making money in Crohn’s patients (an extra, bonus market with little effort on their part). If pharmaceutical companies wanted to do the right thing, they would be out talking to docs about stopping 5-ASA in Crohn’s and using it appropriately in ulcerative colitis. But the drug companies don’t have an incentive to spend the money to do a campaign to reduce drug use. Technically, it is illegal to market 5-ASA’s for Crohn’s, so drug reps choose to avoid the subject entirely. I find the health insurance company complicity puzzling. Maybe it’s cheaper than biologics, because many insurance companies go out of their way to block the use of therapies that are not FDA approved.”

NH: If Crohn’s patients are on this medication, what’s your advice for them?

Dr. Higgins: “Talk to your doctor. Ask why you are on a medication that is not approved for Crohn’s disease. Ask about the FDA-approved options that *are* effective for Crohn’s. Ask your doctor how well-controlled your intestinal inflammation is. You can measure disease inflammation the following ways:

By CRP (C-reactive protein) or ESR (SED rate) or FCP (fecal calprotectin)
By CTE (for patients over 35 years old) or MRE
By endoscopy if reachable with a colonoscope
By capsule endoscopy if not reachable with a standard scope

If your inflammation is not well controlled, you should be on a more effective medicine to reduce your risk of strictures, obstruction, fistulas, abscesses, perforations, cancer, flares, steroids, hospitalizations, and surgeries.”

Why I refuse to mourn who I was prior to Crohn’s: A birthday reflection

August 19, 2019August 19, 20195 Comments

This week, I turn 36-years-old. Birthdays are a time of reflection, celebration, and excitement. Last month marked 14 years since I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease. A chronic illness that has shaped my adult years and my identity.

I recently saw a post on Instagram about imagining life prior to illness. Prior to the challenges and the hurt that coincide with having a disease that you expect to have until your dying day. It’s heavy and can be overwhelming. There’s no cure for IBD and once you are told you have it, your world and your life is forever altered.

When I see childhood photos of myself and think back on my wonderful memories with family and friends through my college years, that girl often feels foreign to me. There are a few things I wish I could whisper in her ear:

“Stop taking your health for granted.”

“Soak in this feeling of invincibility.”

“Make the most of every single day.”

“Enjoy how carefree it feels to never have to worry about what the next day will bring.”

“Soak in the comfort of never needing medication or going through painful pokes and prods.”

“Have more empathy for those around you who aren’t as lucky.”

…the list goes on. Hindsight is 20/20. I can’t fault myself for floating through life the first 21 years. I’m glad I had no idea of what was to come. At the same time, I wouldn’t trade what the last 14 years have given me:

They’ve brought me debilitating pain that built my strength.

They’ve brought me sorrow that’s made the sunshine feel extra bright on my shoulders.

They’ve brought me fear that’s been replaced with resolve.

They’ve brought me lonely moments that are now filled with the laughter of my little ones.

They’ve brought me years of feeling unlovable, but then finding magic with a man who never once shied away from my illness.

They’ve brought me extreme vulnerability that’s now coupled with gratitude.

They’ve brought me scars internally and externally that I now see as battle wounds.

They’ve brought me years of embarrassment, that’s transformed to a scarlet letter that I wear with pride.

They’ve brought me feelings of worry that have been washed away by clarity and perspective.

On this birthday and moving forward, rather than mourn the loss of who I was up until age 21, I choose to celebrate who I’ve become the last 14 years. While this illness has tried time and time again to rob me of my joy, it’s provided me with evidence of my resilience. Since my diagnosis, I’ve worked full-time as a TV news anchor, reporter, and producer, I’ve gotten married, I’ve had two children in 21 months, and I’ve become a steadfast patient advocate. Crohn’s has shown me that just because I get knocked down with a flare, doesn’t mean I can’t bounce back and be better. With Crohn’s, life often feels like you’re in the passenger seat and your fate is out of your hands. Rather than sit back passively, I choose to grab the wheel. Cheers to 36!

Bigger Than Basketball: Taking IBD support to new heights

January 7, 2019Leave a comment

Loyola University of Chicago Men’s basketball team had a fairytale season last year. There were countless headlines about the Ramblers being THE Cinderella team during March Madness. At the time, Nick DiNardi was a senior walk on and served as a scout to prepare players for each game. Aside from his skills on the hardwood, Nick has battled Crohn’s colitis since he was 11.

The diagnosis came at a time when he was enjoying sports and just being a kid. While playing football, he lost around 25 pounds rather abruptly. Along with weight loss, Nick started feeling extremely fatigued, had intense stomach pains, bloody stool and vomiting. About a year after these symptoms persisted and following several tests and scans, Nick received his IBD diagnosis.

“When I was told I had Crohn’s disease, I was not really sure what to think. I had never heard of it and as an 11-year-old, I really turned to my parents to tell me how to handle it. I tried to continue living my active lifestyle, although many times it was very hard. I felt lonely especially because I felt like I was the only person in the world who had this disease. My grade school friends had no idea why I was crying in class, oftentimes teasing me while I was in pain,” said Nick. “My parents and siblings were always there to do everything they could to make me feel better, but I just never felt like anyone related to the pain I was in.”

In the 11 years since Nick received his IBD diagnosis, it took him nine years to encounter another person with the disease. He felt isolated and alone in his journey. These feelings inspired him to create a 501 (c)(3) nonprofit called Bigger Than Basketball (BTB) in August 2018.

“The mission of BTB is to raise awareness and funding for research to benefit individuals suffering from Crohn’s Disease and ulcerative colitis. BTB encourages, educates, and mentors individuals affected by these diseases to achieve their goals while managing their illness,” said Nick.

One of Nick’s main missions is to make those who are diagnosed with IBD have a solid support system. He hopes BTB will serve as a resource of comfort, a safe space for those in the IBD community to share their stories in order to help others directly or indirectly affected by these diseases. His goal is to create a network of support that allows those of us with IBD to take off our mask and be real about your struggles.

“IBD is a beast of a disease. You can have great days where you feel active and energetic, but you can also have days where you don’t feel like talking or even getting out of bed. With the creation of our network, we want to allow people to express what type of day they are having, so others may be able to relate with their current situation,” explained Nick.

“Bigger Than Basketball is truly an exciting new organization, as one of its key goals is to raise awareness in young persons diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease or ulcerative colitis and show they are not alone, there are others just like them who understand and are experiencing what they are feeling, and that they can still achieve their dreams with the proper understanding and education about their condition,” said Dr. Russell Cohen, MD, FACG, AGAF.

As a member of the Board of Directors and Director of the Inflammatory Bowel Disease Center at the University of Chicago Medicine, Dr. Cohen believes BTB is truly a unique way to reach young people who need help, while expanding awareness and funding with the aim to conquer these conditions in our lifetime.

It’s Nick’s hope that BTB’s network will serve as a buddy system and provide a safety net for people to fall back on. Along with joining the BTB network, you can volunteer and attend upcoming events or donate to the cause. Nick is also looking for people to join the associate board, preferably those living with IBD. To learn more, email: info@biggerthanbasketball.org.

Nick’s IBD has also inspired him to work in the field of medicine, specifically research. He currently works at the University of Chicago with a focus on IBD and Celiac research.

Be sure to show some love to Bigger Than Basketball on social media:

Twitter: BTB_Foundation

Instagram: btb_foundation

Facebook: Bigger Than BasketballFoundation

To the person who doesn’t want to see me smile as I battle Crohn’s

July 23, 2018July 23, 20188 Comments

Today marks my 13^th anniversary with Crohn’s disease. Lights, Camera, Crohn’s: An Unobstructed View, is two years old today! It’s a big day. Lots of reflection and bittersweet emotions. It’s always difficult to know how to handle an anniversary of a chronic illness diagnosis—is it a celebration? Is it a remembrance of what was? Is it all the above? For me, I like to think about how far I’ve come since July 23, 2005. How my perception of life, people and my own personal strength has grown, changed and evolved, thanks to my disease.

Since I started sharing my story in 2014 as a patient advocate, I’ve really put myself out there. I’ve been vulnerable, honest and haven’t minced my words. I’ve been fortunate to have speaking opportunities, videos, conferences and feature stories. While that is all wonderful—it also puts you in a space and a place where complete strangers—who have no idea what you’ve endured, can pass judgement and make claims about how you choose to take on your illness.

This past week—I was surprised by a comment on Facebook, written on an article by Health Central that highlighted my patient story. Like many people on social media, rather than read the article—they reply to the title or the pulled quote in the caption. The featured image from the story is one of me smiling outside my home. The comment on the article: “Crohn’s sucks. Why don’t you show what a real sick person looks like, instead of a happy smiling one???? Just saying—nothing happy about this crap.”

This really took me aback. This felt like a slap in the face. This comment hurt me. Obviously, she didn’t read the article or she would have known about all my hospitalizations, surgery, and rollercoaster of a journey. But to flat-out judge a fellow patient who lives with this debilitating disease and demean me for having a positive attitude…and smiling (God forbid!). If it weren’t for my attitude and the way I approach my Crohn’s disease, I never would have accomplished my dreams of being a television news anchor. I never would have trusted a man with my heart and gotten married. I never would have become a mother and gotten pregnant again.

If there’s anything I’ve wanted you to take away from my blog and my journey, it’s about finding the power of positivity in your experiences and seeking the good that still exists in your life, despite your disease. If you want to think woe is me and suffer all day long on the couch…that will be your life. If you choose to smile and show Crohn’s who’s boss, than no matter what obstacles and setbacks come your way you’ll tackle them and fight through flares with a knowingness that better days are ahead.

As a patient advocate—I know I can’t please everyone. I know not everything I say will resonate with you. And that’s completely fine. All I ask is that you have an open mind and understand that each person chooses to take on this terrible disease how they want to and shouldn’t be called out for it. My life is not all about hospitals, IVs, pain and suffering. Yes, this past week my injection hurt so badly I was sobbing hysterically and yes my stomach was killing me while out to dinner. But you know what, those moments passed. Rather than allow my pain to rob me of a wonderful conversation with a friend—I stayed at the restaurant. Instead of wallowing in the pain of my injection and the bruise that remains days later, I had a bowl of ice cream and gave my 16-month-old a few extra high fives.

So, to whoever decided to try and belittle me on the article about my patient journey and look down on me for smiling, please know I am a real person…and I am sick. But sick doesn’t come first when I think of who I am. It’s a part of me. It’s not all of me. That’s how it will always be, no matter what. And one thing I can promise you—now and in the future, it will never stop me from smiling.

Finding “Hope” and grace through motherhood and IBD

May 28, 2018Leave a comment

Connecting with women who battle inflammatory bowel disease and juggle it all is empowering. When I came across Hope (@hopeheartandhome) on Instagram, I was immediately impressed by her upbeat, real-life look at life as a stay at home, wife and as a blogger. Weeks passed by—and she mentioned she had Crohn’s disease in her in Insta-story. I sent her a direct message because there’s so much we can learn from one another as we navigate motherhood and life in general with inflammatory bowel disease. I specifically was interested in featuring Hope because she’s pregnant with baby #2!

Hope is 28 and lives in Charlotte, North Carolina with her husband and two-year-old daughter, Evie. She’s due with her second baby this October. August marks 10 years since she was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease. In getting to know Hope, her name fits her to a T. She is inspiring, driven, funny and focused on living her best life—despite her disease.

Like many of us, Hope was young when she received the life-changing diagnosis. At only 17—she had her entire future before her. In November 2012, after numerous hospital stays and an abscess that would not go away with IV meds, she had surgery to remove her ileum. Unfortunately, post-surgery she faced several complications ranging from a pinhole leak, surgery to repair the leak, as well as a serious case of MRSA. Hope says thanks to her faith in Christ and the support of family and friends, she came out stronger than ever with a 7-inch battle scar to prove it! Hope has been taking Cimzia injections ever since and has been able to maintain remission.

As a woman with IBD–did your Crohn’s present any complications or issues along the way with your first pregnancy?

Hope: “I answer this with an insanely grateful NO! I am extremely blessed that my body reacts so well to pregnancy. In fact, my gastro doctor often teases me that I need to have alllll the babies because my body loves being pregnant. I say this with sensitivity, as I know it is a struggle for many women and due to surgery complications, the doctors I saw were pretty sure I would have difficulty conceiving; however, I am so thankful that God has given me grace in that aspect of my life. I will say that my first pregnancy was a bit of an “oops”, BUT my body was in 100% remission and I believe that greatly contributed to my success. This time around—knowing that I wanted to get pregnant, I made appointments with my GI and had blood-work, a colonoscopy, and wound up having to have an MRI to rule out any potential flare up. Thankfully, I was flare free and my doctor gave us the “ok” to try and conceive. I attribute much of our success to my remission. A healthy mom has a much greater chance of conceiving successfully in terms of Crohn’s Disease.”

How has Crohn’s impacted your role as a mom and a wife?

Hope: “Wow. This a big question! I’ve honestly never really thought about it impacting these roles of mine. I see Crohn’s as a little portion of who I am. It’s a very unglamorous and annoying part of me that I don’t like…but, it’s a part of me and therefore my story. Truthfully, I have been so blessed to have been in remission for about four solid years now, so my roles of wife/mom haven’t been altered by it, and for that I am extremely grateful. It was a long and bumpy road to get here and I would be lying if I said the thought of having a flare up doesn’t terrify me. It definitely does, BUT I try to live my life with as much positivity as I can and a lot of laughter. I’ve found that Crohn’s has matured me far beyond my age in years and that has helped me navigate the endless responsibilities that come with being a young wife and a young mother. I never take health for granted and I am thankful every day for the opportunity to raise my child(ren) free of feeling sick. I get fatigued faster than the average person due to Crohn’s, but I am so used to it, it’s my normal. Also, have you ever met a mom who is full of endless energy?! Nope.”

Now you’re pregnant with baby #2, first of all HUGE congrats! How has this pregnancy compared to your first one–how are you feeling in comparison, etc.?

Hope: “Crohn’s-wise I feel wonderful and am experiencing zero symptoms. Pregnancy wise I am much more exhausted this time around thanks to my full of energy little two-year-old! Second pregnancies are very different… the “newness” is gone, and you know what to expect and I haven’t had a minute to daydream about this baby as often as I did with my daughter, but that’s because she keeps me busy! We’re excited to see if a little boy or another little girl will be joining us this fall!”

What advice do you have for women with chronic illness who aspire to be moms themselves?

Hope: “Patience and prayer. God hears our every thought and I truly believe He desires to give us the desires of our own hearts. The biggest thing I have learned in my life as a Crohn’s girl is that our timing is not our own. We must surrender to Christ and let him lead us through the highs and the lows. If you aren’t a person of faith, my prayer for you is that you find peace in either the waiting of becoming a mom or peace in the journey of motherhood. It is not easy at all, but it is so worth it, and I pray for every woman who might be struggling to carry a baby because of this disease. It truly breaks my heart to think about that suffering. When I was pregnant with Evie, I joined a study called the PIANO study which stands for Pregnancy and Neonatal Outcomes in Women with Inflammatory Bowel Disease. I answered questions during pregnancy and at birth I brought in a lab kit where we sent off blood from me, from Evie, and from my umbilical cord, to study if any of my medications got to my baby. There was no trace of Cimzia in Evie’s blood or the umbilical cord which was wonderful and a big part of why I take Cimzia, as it does not pass the placenta. But, I mention this study to share my passion to help all women with IBD reach their dream of motherhood. I crave more information about this disease specifically for those moms struggling. Know that you’re not alone and you have many people rooting for you and your future babies!”

How do you find time to focus on self-care and combat the fatigue associated with not only motherhood, but IBD?

Hope: “I have not mastered this at all, but I am trying. Working out is something I do for me…my 45 minutes of endorphins, alone time, and knowing I am fueling my body. Open communication with my husband is another thing that helps me focus on self-care. If I am feeling exhausted or just needing some time, I tell him. We must communicate on how I am feeling to fully be a team. And hey, same goes for him! I’ve learned a lot about friendships/relationships and making sure that I set my time and energy on things and in people who are truly rooting for me and my family and vice versa. Life is too short to spend it stressed out or surrounded by people who are not life-giving. That’s been a hard lesson for my people pleasing self, but, being strong in my beliefs and in who I am and what I want to put out into this world has helped my mindset and overall health tremendously.”

Tell me about your blog Hope Heart and Home. With more than 11,200 Instagram followers you must keep busy! What inspired you to start the blog?

Hope: “This blog was originally started by my sister and I actually had my own blog, but once Evie was born, my blog kind of fizzled and after awhile I was missing that creative outlet. My sister was pregnant with her second at the time and we decided to join forces and it was so much fun for us! Recently, my sister has taken a step back from blogging and is pursuing different passion and focusing solely on her family, so the blog has evolved again into an outlet for me. I am an extrovert and love talking with new people/sharing recipes/getting advice/looking at the newest trends/home decor/etc. so blogging just seems like a good fit for my personality. I am a stay at home mommy first and foremost, but the blog has allowed me to have something else that’s just mine and just for me.”

Interested in connecting with Hope? You can do so by emailing her at: hopeheartandhome@gmail.com or following her on Instagram (@hopeheartandhome).

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an unobstructed view

Tag: blogging