The week before my oldest son, Reid, was born I penned him a letter entitled, “A letter to my unborn son, from your mom with Crohn’s disease.” When I wrote that article, I was 38 weeks pregnant. As a first-time mom, living with Crohn’s disease, I had a mix of excitement, anxiety, and fear about taking the plunge into parenting. Tomorrow (March 29th) Reid turns five. Now as I reflect on my experience of living as an IBD mom for half a decade, I want to share what I’ve learned along the way with you and write him another letter to mark this milestone.
Dear Reid,
Where do I begin? Five years ago, you changed my life in the most beautiful, exciting, challenging, and everchanging way possible. You made me a mom. After more than 11 years of fighting Crohn’s disease and constantly feeling at war with my body, I was able to nurture you, help you grow full-term with a flawless pregnancy, and bring you safely into this world. I feel like I blinked, but I also feel like I’ve known you my whole life.
We’ve been through a lot together, little buddy. As a stay-at-home mom I’ve been by your side through everything. I’ve witnessed every moment of you growing up and I feel eternally grateful for that opportunity. Before you were born, I used to pray that I wouldn’t be hospitalized with a flare up until you could walk. I imagined you as a toddler walking into my hospital room. I feared what it would be like to spend countless days away from you, Facetiming with a smile through the tears or trying to recover from surgery with a little one depending on me at home.
But those fears never became realized. We’ve made it five years, flare up free, baby boy. That’s not to say I haven’t had painful days, procedures, and worries along the way. But you’ve been my greatest motivation since you came into this world. You’ve patiently sat day after day on the bathroom floor when mommy’s tummy wasn’t feeling well. You’ve comforted me on the couch when I don’t have the energy to go outside. You’ve cheered me on as I drank colonoscopy prep each year. You’ve handed me candy and told me it was medicine to make me feel better. You’ve attended countless doctor appointments and lab draws. You’ve snuggled me when you know I’m unwell. You’ve sat next to me with a toy pretending to do an injection alongside me on Monday nights, staring at my face to see if I was hurting. You’ve taken your own shots at the pediatrician like a champ because you’re so desensitized.
You constantly see me through a lens I’ve never been seen through before. I catch you watching my facial expressions. I know when you’re worried about me. I melt when you randomly ask me how my tummy is feeling and if I’m feeling happy, but also feel a sense of sadness that you even need to have that thought cross your mind. You are an empath with a heart of gold. While I wish you didn’t need to witness and experience these difficult moments and I try my best to shield you from my struggles, I know in my heart, and I’ve witnessed firsthand how my disease has shaped and continues to shape our family in positive ways.
As you gear up for kindergarten this fall, I will miss our days…even the long ones! You’ve been a constant in my life since the moment I held you for the first time. Your personality as a baby seemed quiet and shy, boy did you have me and everyone else fooled! You’re so silly, so smart, so thoughtful, so outgoing. You’ve given me a run for my money more times than I can count, but I love that you are so steadfast in knowing what you want and sharing that openly with me.
As an IBD mom I find myself looking at you, and at your sister and brother, on the daily wondering and worrying deep down if one day you’ll get my disease. Every night we say our same prayer, the same prayer I’ve said to you all your life, hugging and rocking back and forth.
“Dear God, keep my baby healthy, safe, and strong. Guide him and protect him. Let him continue to be a light for everyone he meets. I love you forever and ever and ever, I love you forever and ever. I love you forever and ever and ever, I love you forever and ever.”
When I pray for *healthy*, I mean no IBD…but you don’t know that yet. You are a picture of health in every sense of the word. Someday when you’re older you’ll know what I’ve been up against my entire adult life, but my hope is that it will inspire and empower you to be strong through the unpredictable peaks and valleys life will throw your way.
I still haven’t explained fully to you that I have Crohn’s disease. I’m not sure it’s necessary to even say “disease” to you. As you grow up, I’ll tell you more. But for now, I don’t want you to worry or wonder. I hope we get another five years hospital visit-free.
Thank you for showing me all that’s possible and for making me a mom. Five years of loving you, guiding you, and watching you thrive has been magical. When I was pregnant with you there was a Florida Georgia Line song called “H.O.L.Y.” that always made me cry thinking of you—because of the line, “you’re the healing hands where it used to hurt.” The other day I was driving home from the grocery store and that song came on the radio. I hadn’t heard it in years. Instant tears. Instant gratitude.
I love you, Reid Robert. I wish I could bottle up your laughter and littleness. I find myself really staring at you lately in awe that we’re at this point already. You are everything I ever dreamed of and more than I ever hoped for. Thank you for being the sweetest motivation and distraction and for being wise beyond your years. I am so so proud of you. I appreciate you reminding me without knowing it that I am so much more than my disease.
With mask mandates ending for most states across the country and the CDC once again changing its guidance about masking, it’s a cause for concern for many who are immunocompromised or considered higher risk for Covid-19. As an immunocompromised mom of three kids under age 5, I feel a bit uneasy about the shift in measures, even though I had Covid-19 in January. I contacted my GI this week to ask her opinion on the mask mandates lifting and navigating this time as an IBD mom. She didn’t hesitate for a second and told me to keep masking—not only for myself but because of my kids. She herself hasn’t stopped masking in public and doesn’t plan to anytime soon.
I polled my followers on Twitter and Instagram by asking: “Do you still wear a mask in public, indoor spaces?” Nearly 500 people responded. On Instagram, 69% responded “yes” to still wearing masks and 31% responded “no”. On Twitter, 88% responded “yes” and 12% responded “no”.
This led me to dig a bit deeper and hear what several top gastroenterologists who specialize in inflammatory bowel disease had to say on this controversial and politicized issue.
Dr. Aline Charabaty, MD, Assistant Clinical Director of the GI Division at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine, and the Director of the Inflammatory Bowel Diseases Center at Johns Hopkins-Sibley Memorial Hospital, offered several fantastic analogies for the IBD community. The one that really hit home to me was talking about family planning and remission in Crohn’s and ulcerative colitis. If you are flaring and want to start a family, the rule of thumb is to be off steroids for at least six months to ensure disease activity is calm. We JUST got through the rampant spike in omicron cases last month. In her opinion, going maskless this soon after that highly contagious variant is premature. She believes we need to wait longer to make sure we are out of the woods and that conditions need to be more stable for a longer period of time. Until then, she recommends those who are more susceptible in the IBD community continue to mask as an extra safety net.
“We are not out of the pandemic. Sure, there are less deaths and fewer severe cases, but people are still getting sick. We saw this happen when we let our guard down and delta hit…then omicron. When you are driving, you wear a seatbelt, follow the speed limit, try not to tailgate, and follow the rules of the road. These are all precautions to drive safely to your destination and avoid an accident. You don’t just do one thing to prevent a car accident. With Covid, we got the vaccines, we’re wearing masks, we’re limiting exposure to large crowds, and measuring risk versus benefit for each of our decisions. It’s not a pick and choose situation of how to keep ourselves and others out of harm’s way.”
Dr. Charabaty went on to say why get sick with something when we really don’t know the long-term effects. We already see Covid can cause a higher risk of depression, heart disease, and autoimmune issues.
“Wearing a mask is such a simple measure. If it adds a benefit, I don’t see why people are saying no to this. This virus can really change your body. Why not add another layer of protection to prevent illness? There are no downsides to wearing a mask, so why not wear it? When you are out and about there are people with weakened immune systems, cancer patients, organ transplant recipients, people on multiple IBD medications…why put these people at risk of infection? The more Covid is transmitted, the higher the risk of mutation, which will cause yet another spike. Each variant has been a result of people letting their guard down to soon with their decision making.”
Dr. Neilanjan Nandi, MD, FACP, Associate Professor of Clinical Medicine, Gastroenterology, Penn Medicine, agrees that while case numbers going down is reassuring, that we are not out of the woods yet. To him, a mask is a sign of empathy for others.
“It’s not about us…whether it’s a caregiver or a family member or friend, this shouldn’t be looked at as an encroachment on our freedom, but rather about showing respect for those around us. The best thing we can do is mask up. Wearing a mask in public, indoor spaces is a smart move because you don’t know the immunization status or exposures of people you don’t know. If you are planning to see family or friends and know people’s vaccination status or if they’ve recently had Covid, you might feel more comfortable not wearing a mask.”
Pre-pandemic photo-May 2019 with Dr. Nandi at Digestive Disease Week in San Diego.
Dr. Nandi reiterated the fact that we’ve learned over the course of the last two years that most of our IBD medications don’t cause an increased risk and may even be protective. While this is reassuring, if you are on 20 mg of prednisone or higher, he highly recommends you mask up as you are more susceptible to illness.
Dr. Uma Mahadevan, MD, Professor of Medicine, and Director of the UCSF Colitis and Crohn’s Disease Center, says every region of the country is different and that your location should be taken into account.
“In the Bay Area we have a high vaccination rate and a low hospitalization rate. You also have to consider the patient’s personal risk and risk aversion.”
Here’s what Dr. Mahadevan tells her patients.
Follow local guidelines for masking
If you are vaccinated and boosted and are in a low-risk area with no mask mandate, its ok to not mask, particularly outdoors. Indoors in crowded shopping areas, etc., I would still consider masking. However, again, low risk patient in a low-risk region, it’s ok not to mask.
For high-risk patients on steroids, double biologics, severely active disease, etc. I still recommend masking.
Dr. Miguel Regueiro, MD, Chair, Digestive Disease and Surgery Institute, Chair, Department of Gastroenterology, Hepatology & Nutrition, Cleveland Clinic, is hopeful we’re headed to what we see with influenza. While of course flu can still be serious and deadly, with enough people vaccinated and exposed to Covid, we can have herd immunity.
“We’re all learning as we go and there’s a lot of “grey” with nothing very “black or white.” For now, I am recommending IBD patients continue to mask. For those who are immunocompromised, wear a mask in indoor spaces, especially crowded spaces such as airports. In outdoor spaces, it is less clear, but masks are probably a good idea when social distancing is not possible.”
Pre-pandemic photo-May 2019 with Dr. Regueiro at Digestive Disease Week in San Diego
Dr. Peter Higgins, MD, Ph.D., M.Sc., Director of the IBD Program at the University of Michigan, says if a person is unvaccinated, masks are a must. He encourages you to talk with your doctor about Evusheld, a monoclonal antibody against Covid-19 for immunocompromised people and those who cannot be vaccinated for medical reasons.
“If the county you live in is below 10 cases per 100,000 people (CDC is saying 200/100,000 for the non-immunosuppressed), then you can consider not wearing a mask. But admittedly, this is an arbitrary number and 200 cases for every 100,000 people seems too high for the immunocompromised population. Especially if you are around kids, the elderly, or those who have not been able to be vaccinated, showing solidarity and wearing a mask is highly recommended.”
He explained that eating indoors with good ventilation is OK, but that is it hard to prove unless you have a CO2 monitor that can show a consistent CO2 ppm (parts per million) < 650. To give you an idea, Las Vegas casinos have good ventilation systems in place to keep restaurants free of smoke and those measure between 400-450 ppm. Dr. Higgins still recommends people do a rapid test within 12 hours of gathering with friends and family. He adds that as we learn more about long Covid and new variants guidance may once again shift.
Dr. Harry J. Thomas, MD,Austin Gastroenterology in Texas, also recommends patient who are immunocompromised (especially those on anti-TNF’s, prednisone, and other immunosuppressants) to mask up.
“I empathize with people who are worried about being judged by others and I recommend that they share — if they feel comfortable — that they (or their family member) have a chronic disease that places them at higher risk. I do feel that abandoning masks right now is premature, especially here in Texas as well as in other parts of the country with lower vaccination rates. I’m not sure if/when there will be another spike, but we still have about 2,000 COVID deaths each day which is really tragic and indicates that the pandemic is far from over.
My personal take
Personally, my husband and I still wear masks in public, indoor spaces. Our children who are in preschool are one of the few who are still wearing masks at their school. While I understand each person has the right to make their own personal decision for themselves and for their families, it’s disheartening and honestly disappointing to see the lack of care for others who are not fortunate to have the luxury of being healthy. I can’t tell you when I’ll feel safe enough to go into a grocery store or the mall without a mask on, it’s going to take time and assurance from my care team that I’m not making a rash decision that could put myself, my family, or even strangers at risk. It’s complicated. I get it.
My daughter at preschool this week. Still masked up.
When you’ve lived with a chronic illness like Crohn’s disease for nearly 17 years and been on immunosuppressive drugs ever since, your perspective shifts. You quickly realize you are not invincible. You recognize and empathize with those who have health struggles and depend on the greater good to make sound decisions. It’s a small act of kindness for the sake of health and safety. Talk with your care team about navigating this new normal. Don’t base your judgements on social media, the news, or your political beliefs. This is an ever-evolving discussion. It’s been a long two years. We’re all tired. But that doesn’t mean apathy is the answer. You may not care, but you are making a statement to those who are vulnerable when you go maskless indoors.
It’s ok to be unsure. It’s normal not to want to be judged or feel your kids will be outcasts if they’re the only ones at school masking. It’s understandable to feel a bit lost about what is best. But if a mask makes you feel comfortable, safer, healthier, you do you. Know that the medical community and so many others stand in solidarity with you.
When Marquis Ellison met and began dating his wife, Tasheia, in 1999, they were juniors in high school. The couple tied the knot 13 years ago. One year into marriage, Marquis started to experience weight loss, fatigue, anemia, abdominal pain, stomach cramps, and loss of appetite. He dropped to 100 pounds! They were on an anniversary trip to Los Angeles when his symptoms started to become unbearable. After the trip, Marquis was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease. He was 26 years old.
“Upon being diagnosed, I felt a sigh of relief in knowing what the condition was and starting on the right medications. I owned it and decided to beat it by how I live, educate and inspire others.”
Tasheia has been by Marquis’ side every step of the way. Every colonoscopy. Every flare. Every doctor appointment. He thanks God every day for a wife who truly exemplifies what it means to be a partner in sickness and in health.
Focusing on faith and family
Marquis keeps busy as a husband, father, and personal trainer. He gives all the credit to God.
“Faith is the cornerstone of who I am and why I have the outlook I have with Crohn’s. If God wants to completely heal me, I know He can. But if not, I know He’ll give me the strength to endure and I’m at ease with that. There’s always a greater good for what we go through and if my journey living with Crohn’s disease can inspire and encourage others, all praise to the Most High!”
Since becoming a father three years ago, Marquis says his faith and his son are his “why” …why he’s so enthusiastic about doing all he can to take care of his body and controlling what he can.
“Being a dad is the greatest gift and blessing. Knowing this little person is your responsibility. I want my son to see that while I have IBD, I don’t let it stop me and set the example he can follow when faced with life’s unpredictability. My son witnessed me running the marathon cheering me on at mile 22 and the finish line. When we got back home, he wanted to wear my medal. I asked him if he wanted to run a marathon in which he replied, ‘yes’. That was a great feeling knowing I’ve inspired my son despite my condition.”
Shout out to IBD men
When you hear about people’s IBD journeys, it’s more common to hear from women, even though Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis impact genders equally. Marquis wants men to recognize they are not alone and to speak up and tell their stories.
“Your story matters. Your voice matters. Speaking about your health and opening up doesn’t make you any less of a man, it only enhances it.”
As a Black man, the lack of representation, and health disparities, span far and wide. Marquis wants you to know you are not alone in your struggles.
“Our voices matter. The more we advocate, the more we’ll show that Black and Brown communities are affected with IBD and should be represented more often. I’m proud to be an ambassador with Color of Crohn’s and Chronic Illness (COCCI), where we’re working to bridge the gap and lack of representation.”
Running for a reason
Marquis recently completed the New York City Marathon in November. He says it was the toughest and most victorious accomplishment he’s ever experienced. His race shirt read, “Mr. Crohn’s Fighter” to represent all IBD warriors and show that you can still do remarkable things, despite your disease. Life with IBD is a marathon, not a sprint. That mentality prepared Marquis for the race.
“Living with IBD is unpredictable. The unpredictability of a flare up or foods not agreeing with you always feels like something is looming. When running, you never know how the course or weather will be. You can train hills or in the rain, but you may still face adversity you didn’t prepare for. With running and with Crohn’s disease, it’s all about mindset and the ability to adapt and repeatedly overcome. Focus on your current reality and not on what hasn’t happened or what could happen.”
He’s currently training to run the New York City Half March 20th, 2022.
Focusing on what you can control
Marquis manages his IBD through fitness, nutrition, mindset, and by taking Cimzia, a monthly self-injection. He’s all about controlling what you can and not succumbing to your circumstances.
“Life is 20% of what happens to you and 80% of how you respond to it. I choose to focus on the 80% by controlling what I can. I always say, I have Crohn’s disease, it doesn’t have me. IBD may try and take me down, but it will never knock me out.”
Living with an unpredictable and often debilitating chronic illness like IBD can be overwhelming. Being confident in the care team who leads the charge in managing your disease is incredibly important. Life with IBD is a marathon, not a sprint. The variables and challenges change with each year. You need a team of doctors who listen, advocate for you, see you as more than just a number, and guide you with personalized care.
This week on Lights, Camera, Crohn’s, we look at the steps you can take to ensure you’re in good hands and feel comfortable with the specialists in your arsenal. Much like a support system, having a care team of medical professionals who genuinely care for the IBD community makes all the difference in how you’re able to cope and make the best decisions for your health through all the peaks, valleys, and lows.
When you meet your GI by chance
Since I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in July 2005, I’ve had two chance encounters in the hospital with gastroenterologists (GIs) who ended up being my doctors for years after our initial meetings. The first time—when I was diagnosed in my hometown (Chicago suburbs), I hit it off immediately with the GI who was given my case. He ended up being my doctor for a decade.
Prior to moving to St. Louis in 2014, I was hospitalized with a bowel obstruction. My GI was 5 hours away, so I had to rely on a stranger to guide my care locally. The GI who looked after me in the hospital had a wonderful bedside manner and as much as I didn’t want to switch medical providers, I knew I would need to find a GI in Missouri. That GI looked after me for about three years, until I had my third bowel obstruction in 15 months, even after switching to weekly Humira injections.
At that point, one of his partners called my hospital room and spoke to the fact that I kept having hospitalizations for the same issue, but no changes were being made. He ordered an MRE (Magnetic resonance enterography) to find the underlying cause of the issue and see if bowel resection surgery was on the table. When the results came through, this doctor CALLED my hospital room, and casually told me I needed at least 10 inches of my small intestine removed. My actual GI never followed up. Never reached out. Never followed up with me after my surgery that ended up involving the removal of 18 inches of my small intestine, my appendix, and my Meckel’s diverticulum.
I knew after that surgery it was time for me to advocate for my care and get a different GI. I desperately needed to make a change. While it’s not easy to break-up with a doctor and it can be hard to navigate the medical provider landscape in a new city, I knew it was necessary. You must stop worrying about hurting someone else’s feelings and put your health—both physical and mental, first.
How I switched to a different GI
Whether you’ve recently moved to a new state or know in your heart it’s time to make a change. It’s important you feel empowered as you switch your specialists. When I had my post-op appointment with the colorectal surgeon, I asked him which GIs he would recommend. He gave me two names. I then reached out to my local Crohn’s and Colitis Chapter and while they couldn’t give me names of specific providers, they connected me with fellow patients who could offer up advice. I went to lunch with a few ladies with IBD and I was given the same name. That GI has been my doctor ever since (November 2015).
Since that time, I’ve been in deep remission. My GI is extremely proactive and aggressive with her approach. She leaves no stones unturned. She calls me directly if I write her and the nurses a question on the Patient Portal. I’ve had three healthy pregnancies and three healthy babies. She’s helped me navigate so much of the unknown and listens to my questions. She knows I’m a patient advocate who follows the research and stays on top of my health and rather than talk down to me, she takes what I have to say into consideration, always.
Discovering what matters most to you
Everyone has a different preference when it comes to the personality and approach of their doctors. Some prefer a gentle bedside manner. Others want no fluff and a direct, business-like approach. Some like a little mix of both. Think about what matters most to you. I’m a bit of a softie and bedside manner matters a lot to me.
Try and think of it this way—at your worst, when you’re hospitalized, what kind of doctor do you want leading the charge, walking into your hospital room, and guiding your care? If your GI is intimidating, lacks empathy, and is cold, it could add insult to injury and make your already dreadful experience that much worse. On the flipside, having a straight shooter who tells you like it is and doesn’t sugarcoat what’s going on can also be beneficial. Envision who you want by your bedside as you fight a flare and go from there.
There are GIs who do not specialize in IBD, so when you are seeking a new one, try and make sure their focus and expertise is Crohn’s disease/ulcerative colitis.
Navigating Medical PTSD with new care providers
Medical PTSD is real. Oftentimes due to the nature of IBD we are put into vulnerable positions because of where our disease presents. You may be asked at a research hospital if medical students can watch. You may feel uncomfortable or uneasy starting fresh with someone new. This is all normal and justified. Each time you have to re-tell your medical history you are forced to re-live your trauma. A friend of mine in the IBD community recently told me that her therapist advises her to write out your medical history.
This way you simply hand over a document to your care team that lays out your full story without any key details missing and without having to talk about memories and experiences that can be harmful to your mental health and well-being. Along with bringing a printout version, it can be helpful to upload the document to the Patient Portal. This takes the pressure off you to give a high-level explanation of your IBD journey and allows you to focus on the right now. The right now being the questions you have presently and what issues you want to tackle. Say goodbye to the elevator speech that tends not to include the nitty gritty.
Do your homework prior to the appointment by writing down your questions ahead of time. You can either have pen and paper handy to write down notes, ask the doctor if you can voice record the appointment so you have the details, or type the notes right into your phone.
Building your dream team
With IBD we all know a care team is made up of more than gastroenterologist. It can be helpful to ask your GI who they recommend within their hospital system so that all the records are readily available. By following up with a recommendation from your GI, you know the other specialist is someone they respect and someone who they would have effective means of communication with.
Trust word of mouth—but also trust your gut. If a medical provider feels dismissive, rushed, or like they aren’t listening to you, move on to the next. You are in the driver’s seat to build your team. Depending on where you live—I know it can be tricky and complicated to find accessible care and leading IBDologists. It may mean you have to drive a couple of hours every few months to receive the type of care your IBD demands. Ideally, your GI will be local so that when a flare up requires hospitalization you can go to the hospital and know who will lead your care. But not everyone is afforded that luxury. While I was finding my GI in St. Louis, I would contact my GI in the Chicago suburbs and keep him aware of what was happening. He provided me advice every step of the way and I’ll always remember how he called me from his cell phone the night before my bowel resection and assured me the surgery would be a “fresh start”. He was right.
While IBD is often out of our control, building your care team and finding specialists who do all they can to help improve your quality of life, understand your individual disease process, and constantly look to do more than status-quo, will give you the confidence you need when symptoms start to go awry or when you need to make major medical decisions about medication, surgery, and beyond.
Imagine having a laundry list of medical conditions, along with your IBD. For many, it’s a stark reality. In a poll I recently conducted on Instagram, 64% of our patient community responded that they live with multiple chronic illnesses. This week—we hear from several women about what it’s like to juggle IBD and more.
As someone with Crohn’s disease I learned a lot by interviewing others and hearing about their personal struggles and triumphs as they face the unknown. Whether it’s trying to pinpoint which symptoms pertain to which illness a person is living with to coordinating a care team and living through a nearly 2-year pandemic that has shed light on how the world perceives our community—it’s heavy. It can be discouraging and it’s a lot. At the same time, finally getting answers gives some people hope and a feeling of relief.
As Brooke Abbott so eloquently puts it—it can be a domino effect. She started experiencing IBD symptoms when she was 18, she was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis in 2008 at age 24. Brooke also has IBS-D, Psoriasis, Ankylosing Spondylitis, trigeminal neuralgia, erythema nodosum, and asthma. Being a mom of color with multiple conditions in a world where patients are also “othered” has not been an easy journey. Finding a care team was a challenge for Brooke. She experienced unconscious bias, sexism, and racism when she was newly diagnosed. Not to mention irregular healthcare coverage.
“It reminds me of babysitting multiple children. The one screaming and crying got my initial attention. Once they were settled, I’d move on to the next child that needed my immediate attention. It’s a balancing act and I try to be as flexible with myself and give myself as much grace as possible. A breakthrough flare of one can ignite the flare of the another. Being diagnosed wasn’t the gut punch. It’s the days when my life is paused to cater to another illness after I just finished catering to another.”
Natasha Weinstein was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in 2004 when she was only 11. Since then, she’s been diagnosed with IBS, Fibromyalgia, Arthritis, Migraines, Asthma, Carpal Tunnel syndrome, Tarsal Tunnel syndrome, Dermatagraphism, Vertigo, Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, Endometriosis, Pelvic Floor Dysfunction, Depression, Anxiety, OCD, and multiple vitamin deficiencies. She says juggling all these health conditions feels like a full-time job that she can never escape.
“It feels like my body is constantly falling apart. I feel like I live at the doctor, but I am grateful to be where I am today. I have an incredible job, a supportive family and understanding friends. My medically complex health has taught me resilience and strength, despite the frustrating and emotionally breaking days. Being chronically ill gives you a unique perspective on life. Add in MULTIPLE conditions and it’s a whole new ball game.”
Rocio Castrillon has been living with Crohn’s disease for 18 years. She also has Anemia, Asthma, Cataracts, Fibromyalgia, Glaucoma, Hypothyroidism, Uterine Fibroids, and Uveitis.
“Having multiple conditions is complicated particularly if one affects the other. I have learned to manage my conditions as best as possible, but my greatest fear is the flare of one of them at any given time, so I feel like I’m always waiting for something to happen. It’s extremely challenging to manage multiple providers, conditions, and medications. And they are all invisible illnesses. So, no one can “see” what I’m going through even though I may be suffering tremendously. That’s one of the hardest things for me…living a life full of chronic disease(s) in silence.”
Sarah Holleman was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease and Antiphospholipid Antibody Syndrome (APS) in 2018. It is also called Lupus Anticoagulant, but you don’t have to have Lupus to get it (although many people with Lupus get APS). Sarah went from being a healthy 28-year-old to having two chronic illnesses and seeing four specialists on a regular basis.
“It is utterly exhausting. Dealing with insurance, waiting rooms and doctors’ appointments is all-consuming. I had a healthy baby boy in May 2021, but going through a pregnancy with two chronic illnesses was challenging. My GI monitored my IBD symptoms, which fortunately stayed in remission. For APS, I had to switch from my oral medications to twice daily self-injections until the last few weeks when it went to three times a day.”
Trying to find balance
Laura Steiner was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis in 2012, she also has IBS, Asthma, hidradenitis suppurativa, IBS, and a few other inflammatory skin conditions.
“It can be confusing and frustrating balancing all of the different symptoms and having all doctors on board with everything. It also sometimes limits the available treatment options because for example, Inflectra that I am on for my UC is also used to treat HS, but since I’m already on it there is not much more the dermatologist can offer me for relief. UC is the only condition that tends to really interfere with work, so that is my #1 priority to manage, the rest I can deal with and manage.”
Meredith Ditty was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease at age 20 in 2011, she later found out she also has Primary Schlerosing Cholangitis (PSC), a liver disease that people with IBD develop. She also has Anemia, Gilbert’s Syndrome, Psoriasis, and Ovarian Cysts.
“I was so young, other people were living a normal life and I was stuck dealing with all of this. Thankfully, I had a great support system and had emotional, physical, and financial help, to get me where I am today.”
Emily Adams has Crohn’s disease and Lupus. She became symptomatic with both in 2020 at 26 years old. Her IBD has been flaring since July 2020. As you can imagine, being diagnosed during the pandemic made the process extra stressful and worrisome. Emily has been hospitalized five times in the last two years without visitors.
“Before I was diagnosed with Crohn’s and Lupus, I was very healthy. I was training to run my third half marathon and I was in my third year of teaching 5th grade science. Since getting sick I have had to stop working and I’m now on disability and I had to move in with my sister, as living alone was too difficult for me. My life went from complete independence to needing my family every day for help. Honestly, getting sick has made me more patient, empathetic, and kind. I’ve had a lot of time to think and reflect because my life is a lot slower these days. I appreciate the small things because now the small things are the big things.”
Alyssa Pinkham was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in 2020 and was recently diagnosed with Gastroparesis and GERD. She’s dealt with anxiety issues and learning disabilities for more than a decade. She often struggles with knowing which condition is causing her abdominal pain. Alyssa credits coming to the realization that she was experiencing additional health issues to the friends she’s made through the online chronic illness community.
“It is difficult to navigate multiple chronic illnesses of the digestive system. They oftentimes have overlapping symptoms and if one condition is doing poorly, usually the others are doing poorly as well. It is also difficult having multiple gastroenterologists for the different conditions. In my case, they are on opposite sides of the state. It’s a challenge for the gastroenterologists to communicate their specific treatment plans with one another and with me so that they can provide an effective treatment plan that will put my Crohn’s and gastroparesis in remission. The lack of communication is frustrating and exacerbates my anxiety. When my anxiety isn’t being controlled it sets off my Crohn’s and gastroparesis conditions, which leads to more anxiety. It’s a vicious cycle.”
Katie S. was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in 2011, she was 21. Then, in 2015, she was diagnosed with nodular scleritis, an inflammatory condition that impacts the white outer coating of the eye. If left untreated, it can cause vision loss.
“It’s hard having two chronic health conditions and continues to be a challenge. I started therapy about a year ago. I wish I started sooner. Talking with someone has helped me. I struggle with feeling like my body is broken. I feel like I’m letting myself (and others) down because I’m sick more times than not. The book, “This Too Shall Last: Finding Grace When Suffering Lingers” by K. J. Ramsey was helpful to me. She writes about how our culture treats suffering like a problem to fix and the shame that comes with that all through a Christian point of view. It brought me comfort, understanding, and even some more acceptance for what I’m living right now. I would highly recommend checking it out.”
Feeling unsupported through the pandemic
Ableism existed long before the pandemic, but it seems that unfortunate mentality and attitude has been exacerbated since the start of these unsettling times.
Rocio explained, “While there have been many accommodations that have been made during the pandemic for the general public (i.e., curbside pickup, free delivery, etc.) I wish this had been the option for us long ago. Working from home is yet another dynamic that has allowed everyone to have the flexibility that many of us with chronic diseases need on a daily basis. It has become acceptable and more of a norm now, yet any previous requests for similar accommodations for us have always been denied or frowned upon. I’ve truly seen who supports and cares about others and who is selfish and out for themselves.”
Mo Lynn was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in October 2019, when she was 23 years old. She also has Polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), endometriosis, and non-alcoholic fatty liver disease (NAFLD).
“The world, the workplace, and the US health care system are not built for people like me. Throughout the pandemic, it’s been made clear to me that a lot of people find the deaths of people like me with chronic illnesses or disabilities as inevitable and meaningless. Never mind the value I bring to my family, my friends, and society. There will always be people who think that the lives of the chronically ill /disabled are meaningless.”
Katie says, “I choose to believe that most people are good and kind, doing the best they know how to do at the time. But it’s hard, really hard–especially for the chronically ill right now. I don’t want covid. I don’t want mild covid. I don’t want severe covid. I don’t want to give covid to someone else. I don’t want long covid. I know what it’s like to be sick for days, months, and years. When I personally know people who are choosing not to get vaccinated, it hurts. It makes me feel like they don’t care about me. When I see people not wearing a mask, or their nose hanging out, it makes me feel like they don’t care about me or the health of their community. So, my perspective on the world around me: we need to do better. We need to be better.”
Brooke says looking through social media at peoples’ selfishness and carelessness has made her sad and frustrated with the evolution of humanity.
“We talk a lot about community and inclusivity on our platforms, but when it’s time to perform action to ensure that all are safe and healthy, we fail to do so if it feels inconvenient for us. Watching people fail their neighbors by simply wearing a mask, stopping the spread of this highly contagious virus is just heartbreaking. It’s also frustrating to watch people waste their health by risking it for a party, or a concert or a bar night.”
Rapid Fire Chronic Illness Tips
Having chronic illness equates to a lot of trial and error. From finding your care team to what works best to manage your health—be patient as you find what helps you get your disease(s) under control and recognize that what works for one person won’t necessarily work for you.
Seek therapy and don’t look back. When you are constantly at battle with your body and worrying about the what if, it can be overwhelming and all-consuming. Give yourself permission to take time to put your mental well-being first.
Keep your GI as the team lead or quarterback of your care. Let them guide the decision-making and set the stage for your care plan. Build your care team around your GI.
Rather than focusing on remission, focus on the thing that is ailing you the most and heal that. Once that is settled, move on to the next thing.
Try to let go of the guilt and shift your mindset about how your caregivers are sacrificing for you. Instead, think about their genuine care and concern for you despite your illness. They show up day after day because of their unconditional love for you.
See all your doctors in the same network so they’re able to share reports and test results easily. Making information accessible to your care team takes the burden off your shoulders to play telephone and relay information back and forth.
If you’re being dismissed or feeling unheard by your care team, remember you aren’t married to them. Find a new team. The time and effort are worth it. Ask for referrals.
If friendships and relationships feel toxic to you, let them go. Use your medical misfortunes to your advantage. You have an innate superpower to see peoples’ true colors—if they genuinely care, if it’s a relationship of convenience or actual care, and you see who shows up and who disappears to the background.
If you’re tired of being sick and tired, please know you are not alone in feeling this way. There will be days when managing multiple health conditions are extra tough. Anger, frustration, and sadness are all normal and justified. When you live with multiple health conditions—or even *just* IBD it’s like a daily game of Jenga. One wrong move, one decision, can inadvertently cause the tower to come crashing down. It’s a fragile balancing act that comes with its fair share of setbacks and challenges but also provides a unique perspective and appreciation for life and taking on each day without taking anything for granted.
Coordinating medication through specialty pharmacies is somewhat of an artform for chronic illness patients. Unless you deal with managing this monthly, you may be unaware of the endless time and energy that goes into making sure all the ducks are in a row to keep everything on schedule with your gastroenterologist, insurance, and pharmacy.
A few weeks back, I received a letter in the mail explaining that beginning January 1, 2022, my Humira would be handled through a different specialty pharmacy. As soon as I saw the letter my first gut reaction was that I was being switched to a biosimilar. Upon further reading, I learned that Alliance RX Walgreens, my specialty pharmacy, will now be Accredo (through Express Scripts).
Letter I received from my previous specialty pharmacy.
What now?
As a patient who has been on Humira since July 2008, this is the fifth time I have had to switch specialty pharmacies. Previously, it was because I switched employers and had different insurance. This time around my husband’s insurance switched specialty pharmacies. And even though this is far from my first rodeo—as a person who depends on a biologic every 2 weeks, I worry about a lapse in my medication, so I’m being proactive by communicating the change with my care team.
The letter stating the change said everything for my Humira would automatically be switched over, as long as there were refills remaining. I wasn’t sure if I had refills.
Communicating with your care team
With the New Year holiday being this past week, I went ahead and wrote my GI on the Patient Portal. Here’s the correspondence so you see how it all played out from the back end (no pun intended!)
Hi Dr. G and team,
Wanted to give you a heads up that I received a letter that beginning Jan. 1 my specialty pharmacy that I go through for my Humira prescription will switch from Alliance RX Walgreens to Accredo (Express Scripts).
The letter states that my prescription will transfer automatically as long as I had refills on file with Alliance. I just wanted to make sure that was the case and that there was nothing we needed to do on our end to ensure a smooth transfer.
My next Humira injection is Monday, Jan 10–so I’ll be scheduling a delivery next week.
Thanks!
Natalie
Good morning, Natalie,
I updated your chart (removed Alliance Rx and put in Accredo) as your specialty pharmacy. I did send in a new prescription for your Humira to Accredo this morning that way they would have it. It does look like your prior authorization previously expired. I have notified Lori so that she is aware that a new auth may be required. I did want to verify with you that your insurance coverage will remain the same going into the new year?
Thank you for the heads up, we always appreciate it.
Thanks SO much. Yes, my insurance coverage is the same (has not changed). Appreciate your follow up!
Natalie
You’re very welcome. That sounds great, I have notified Lori so that she is aware that your insurance will remain the same, that way she can work on that new prior auth if it’s needed.
Perfect, thanks so much! Do you know if Accredo will contact me next week to schedule delivery or if I contact them the first go-around?
Natalie,
I would suggest contacting them. Lori is aware that we will likely need a new prior auth but you contacting them to schedule delivery will also initiate that process (if needed).
Will do– that’s helpful to know. I’ll plan to call them on Monday to get the ball rolling. Thanks for all your help, have a Happy New Year!
When someone receives medication from a specialty pharmacy know they are on the phone coordinating delivery every month, making sure prior authorizations, insurance, and drug savings cards are all in check. It’s like a never-ending homework assignment that’s constantly looming. Many specialty pharmacies have apps to help “simplify” the process for patients, but I’ve found that the times I’ve tried to use apps in the past, I still receive a phone call about ordering my Humira and never know if my online order even went through. Call me “old school” but I still prefer to order my medication over the phone each month for the past 13-plus years. Find what works best for you and stick with it!
As you can see, it’s helpful to have a care team that responds promptly on the Patient Portal and helps you navigate the ins and outs of ordering your biologic. Rather than being unsure and worried about when and how I’ll receive my next Humira delivery, I now feel confident that it will be a seamless transition. I highly recommend grabbing the reins and checking so you don’t end up in a situation where you’re scrambling to get your medicine on time. Being proactive saves everyone involved a lot of headaches.
Tis the season for reflecting on the year past and all we’ve experienced and endured—both the beautiful moments, the hardships, and even the mundane. As an IBD mom, 2021 was a big year for my family. We moved to our forever home in June when I was 35 weeks pregnant with our third child and welcomed Connor to our family in July. While there aren’t many milestones more amazing in life, they also come with their fair share of stress. I don’t know about you, but stress often triggers my Crohn’s. It goes without saying the holiday season alone can be complicated to navigate with chronic illness, especially in the middle of an ongoing pandemic.
My best advice—listen to your body. If you feel like you’re being stretched thin and your symptoms are trying to speak to you, take time to listen. While chronic illness is always inconvenient when it’s flaring, ignoring an issue that is presenting only delays the inevitable and could set you up for an even bigger setback. I hope this week between Christmas and the New Year that you take time for YOU. Breathe. Relax. Reset. It’s something I struggle with and hope to improve on in 2022, so I’m right there with you!
COVID Every Where You Turn
I don’t know about you, but the pandemic has been creeping closer to my doorstep with each day that passes. Close friends had Christmas plans canceled. IBD friends near and far are sick with COVID right now. My family on both sides have dealt with being exposed, also re-shaping how our holidays ended up this year. I hosted Christmas for the first time in my life! Only 10 people (including my fam of 5), but hey, you gotta start somewhere! And moving forward, I think I’m going to host the holiday from now on!
On a serious note, these are troubling times. Almost two years in and it feels like we’re in a dark, never-ending tunnel, with no light. But, just like life with IBD, try not to allow the looming darkness to dull the beauty that still resides around you. I found myself crying happy tears many times on Christmas day. Despite the ongoing burden and hardship of the pandemic, I felt incredible amounts of gratitude for my family and getting to be a mom to three children. Seeing Christmas through their eyes was beyond magical and feeling well the entire day was the cherry on top.
As much as we’re all “over” the pandemic, it’s not a time to throw caution to the wind as we gear up for 2022. Stay vigilant. Use your voice. Speak up if you’re not comfortable, rather than being a people-pleaser. Set boundaries and don’t feel like you need to explain yourself to anyone. Think about the risk vs. the benefits, just as you do when making decisions about your body with IBD. Have ongoing dialogue with your care team and the doctors who treat you rather than from acquaintances on social media who have no medical background whatsoever.
Spread Holiday Cheer, Not COVID
I’ll leave you with my family’s Christmas card and a thank you for following our journey, offering support, love, and prayers along the way. The IBD family is so special to me. I honestly don’t know how I went the first 10 years of my disease without connecting with our community. Since I started sharing my story and opening myself up for support, taking on Crohn’s feels a lot less overwhelming. You inspire me to write, to share, to collaborate, and to do all I can to make a difference. Once you’re a journalist, you’re always a journalist…and I find it so rewarding to be a trusted resource in our community for insight about diagnosis to career, to finding love, having babies, being a mom, you name it. Thank you for listening and for reading. Excited to see what 2022 has in store!
Overwhelmed. Terrified. Unsure. When Heather Hausenblas’ son, Tommy, was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease December 6, 2018 at age 16, she didn’t even know what IBD stood for. She knew she had a lot to learn and was on a mission to get her son healthy. Fast forward three years and now she’s a published author on the topic.
“Invisible Illness” chronicles how it feels from a parent’s perspective when your teenage child is diagnosed with a chronic illness for which there is no cure. The book provides an inside look at a mother struggling to find her way forward and how she turned despair into hope not only for herself, but for her entire family.
Heather Hausenblas, PhD, is a mother of three boys, health psychology expert, and award-winning researcher. She says when her eldest son was diagnosed with Crohn’s, her personal and professional roles collided. Not only was she going to battle for her child, but she also began her mission to help those with chronic illness eliminate the overwhelm and (re)discover health.
Dealing with the words chronic and incurable
“I kept hearing there was no cure, no known cause, no one treatment, and no one symptom. No. No. No. No. He will always have it. It’s never going away,” writes Hausenblas in her book.
Chronic and incurable-these two words were exploding in Heather’s mind on repeat. Tommy went from being on the high school baseball team, with lots of friends, doing well in school, and being very active…to living with a complicated and often debilitating disease. Everything in their life came to an abrupt halt. She explains how the illusion of youthful invincibility began to fade. Something anyone in our community can relate to. Health is often taken for granted until it is robbed away from you.
Feeling helpless through the struggles
She writes, “I could hear the pain in Tommy’s voice. But I was helpless. To put his excruciating pain in perspective, one Crohn’s patient described it as, “I’ve given birth without an epidural twice in my life, and the pain of Crohn’s disease was far worse than that.” “Tommy’s physical agony was accompanied by the unending frustration involved in trying to diagnose this complex disease. His symptoms and complaints had been overlooked—even dismissed.”
When a child or parent is diagnosed with IBD it impacts not only the person with Crohn’s or ulcerative colitis, but each family member in a unique way. It’s often said that IBD is a “family” disease.
“Torture was seeing my child wasting away to a skeleton, dropping nearly twenty pounds on his already lean frame, constantly running to the bathroom, and having excruciating pain. Torture was watching him leave the house only to run back seconds later for the bathroom while his friends went to the party.”
As a mom with Crohn’s myself, reading Heather’s perspective as the parent watching her son endure pain and hardships struck a chord with me because when you’re a young patient and are diagnosed before becoming a parent yourself, you often don’t take the time to think about how your disease and struggles are impacting the people who love you most. Not out of disregard, but simply because you are dealing with so much internally and externally it can be difficult to think outside of yourself.
Healing with food
While Heather shares a great deal of insight about the importance of diet and nutrition as it relates to IBD throughout the book, she also talks about the challenges Crohn’s presents since each person tolerates food differently. She explains how it’s impossible to find a one-size-fits-all diet but advises patients to journal everything from what they eat to how often they go to the bathroom to try and tailor a personal diet that works for you. Discovering your own triggers and knowing which foods are risky or tend to cause pain is a huge step in managing your illness.
“After a few weeks of strictly following the SCD (Specific Carbohydrate) diet, Tommy said that gluten wasn’t his issue. He somehow knew. He knew his body. He now eats gluten when he wants…Tommy’s liberalization of the SCD highlights the practical concern of adhering to a very restrictive diet.”
“Invisible Illness” includes 30 pages of helpful inflammation-fighting recipes. Throughout the book Heather talks about how she “detoxed and decluttered” her home and the cathartic effect journaling had on her coping process then and now.
Now, as a sophomore at Clemson University studying engineering, Tommy is in remission and does not take medication. He manages his Crohn’s by eating a healthy diet made up of organic, whole food, has an active lifestyle, and says his Crohn’s disease does not define who he is.
Forming connections and offering hope
Heather hopes that by candidly sharing her family’s journey with IBD that she opens the door for connections between other parents and families living the same reality. She recommends fellow parents to get involved with local organizations, so you recognize from the get-go that you are not alone.
Her main goal with publishing “Invisible Illness” was to “to help others navigate through the storm of medical and health information to figure out the right wellness path.”
How to purchase “Invisible Illness”
You can get your hands on a book by ordering a copy on Amazon.
Work life balance takes on a whole new meaning when you have chronic illness. Molly Dunham-Friel can attest to that. Diagnosed in 2012 with ulcerative colitis, one year after receiving her undergraduate degree, Molly was forced to begin her professional career with unexpected titles she was just getting accustomed to—IBD and IBS. Molly remains just as ambitious and aspirational as she was prior to her diagnosis, but undoubtedly has experienced common roadblocks that come along with living with chronic health conditions. While the career detours were not always welcome, the experiences Molly has had over the last nine years blossomed into finding what she is truly passionate about.
This week on Light’s Camera Crohn’s we take a close look at having IBD in the workplace, whether you work in an office or at home.
Quite the Go-Getter
While IBD is unpredictable, one constant in Molly’s life has always been her go-getter attitude. She tells me she’s been known to work multiple jobs since the age of 15.
“I am not very good at slowing down and I get frustrated when anything gets in my way, including being chronically ill. The one professional aspiration that I have always held is my drive to help people in need, the marginalized, the forgotten, the invisible, the ones who truly need my help.”
Since her ulcerative colitis and IBS diagnoses, Molly has worked full-time, while often holding additional part-time jobs. At one point she was working five jobs, simply to pay for her healthcare costs! Molly says life got more complicated and extremely overwhelming once she turned 26 and could no longer be on her parents’ medical insurance
“It was stressful and defeating because now I had added pressure to hold a job that provided me with affordable medical insurance to get the care I need as a chronic illness patient. IBD is extremely expensive to manage due to the medication, procedures, doctors’ visits, labs, you name it, it costs a lot. This felt heavy as a 26-year-old still learning how the world works and how I wanted to make the world a better place.”
Molly has had to leave jobs she enjoyed to go to companies with better benefits, which also came with less satisfaction.
“I have been stuck in jobs solely because I needed the cost controlling benefits the organization offered. I have had to say no or not apply to amazing jobs and organizations because the benefits would not cover my chronic illness needs enough where I could afford it. I feel like my health insurance needs as a chronic illness warrior trump my career aspirations, which feels suffocating and leaves me frustrated. I want to do what brings me joy and not just what brings me healthcare coverage.”
New purpose, new goals
After starting her blog, Better Bellies by Molly, beginning to volunteer with the Crohn’s & Colitis Foundation, and connecting with amazing warriors via social media. Molly realized her passion for helping to support the IBD community.
“My goal is to support, educate and empower chronic illness patients, particularly those living with IBD and IBS, so they don’t feel alone, like I did upon my diagnosis. I am also passionate about helping patients feel empowered to advocate for their health. I haven’t figured out how I will turn this into my career, but blogging and social media is a great start!”
Advice for those with chronic illness nervous about working
There is no sugar coating how hard and demanding it is to work full-time on top of the full-time job of managing chronic illness life. Here is Molly’s advice:
No job is worth your health. Put your health first whenever you can.
Know your rights. IBD and IBS are both conditions listed in the American Disability Act. If you are discriminated against due to your IBD or IBS, speak to someone you trust to fight for your rights. Depending on the organization, employees with disabilities can submit formal paperwork to receive reasonable accommodation, which is any modification or adjustment to a job. Like most things with chronic illness, there is a lot of paperwork involved, but reasonable accommodation is one mechanism to look into in addition to going to HR and asking what other accommodations your employer offers.
Who you work for matters. Having an empathetic and compassionate boss and supervisor makes working full-time while chronically ill more enjoyable.
Disclose what you wish to disclose when you wish to disclose it. I currently find disclosing my disability status/medical conditions helpful so that my leadership can support me, but it took me six years to get to this level of confidence speaking about my chronic illness life. Give yourself time and grace. I have not always been met with compassion and understanding so follow your intuition and share when you feel ready. I have only held two jobs in the last 10 years where my diagnosis was discussed prior to being hired and onboarded and one of those times it was because my diagnosis related directly to the work and the other was because my advocate work made its way onto my professional resume and after sharing my story online and growing comfortable talking about it.
The more flexibility the better! Ask about work life balance ahead of time. It is especially hard to work an 8:30-5 job which a chronic illness because work hours directly conflict with when doctors’ offices are open and operating. Most medical facilities outside of hospitals are not open for routine or diagnostic care on nights and weekends so the more flexibility your work will allow, the better.
Follow your passion, even if you must detour. I have had so many career detours due to my health insurance needs and flare-ups, but I have never stopped pursing my passion for helping others, even if that meant starting something of my own outside of my full-time work.
Working full time is hard, working fulltime while chronically ill is harder. Juggling work alongside appointments, sick leave, flexible scheduling, and economical health benefits can be overwhelming. These can be hard to find, but as chronic illness patients we are no stranger to doing hard things.
The new perception of working from home
The pandemic has helped companies, organizations, agencies, managers, supervisors, and senior leaders recognize that so much can be accomplished and in many instances that more can be accomplished, by working from home, teleworking more often, and commuting less. It’s not surprising that companies that have pivoted into a more flexible scheduling system will be more likely to retain top talent, including us chronic illness warriors!
“I wish it didn’t take a global pandemic to teach the world that we can work from anywhere, that we can be trusted as employees and that yes more flexibility might actually make us better employees. I think the perception of working from home has drastically shifted and is no longer viewed as an “easy way out” or something that will lead to employee’s “slacking off.” However, I have realized that while many companies and leaders have made this shift, not everyone has and that there is still much room for improvement.”
Working from home benefits patients with IBD and IBS by:
Being able to use our own bathrooms, with our preferred toilet paper and easy access. No longer fearing if the bathroom is occupied when the moment hits.
Not commuting lowers stress and gives us back the time it takes to travel back and forth each day.
Being able to work while feeling ill is easier when in the comfort of your own home, with your blankets, heating pad and supplies to help keep your body as comfortable as possible, while also getting work done. Many times, this would not be possible in an office setting.
Leaving the house can be anxiety producing for those with IBD and IBS due to the often very sudden need to use the restroom. Being able to work from home can diminish that fear.
Having access and privacy for administering medications throughout the workday is easier done at home.
Allowing flexibility to work around doctor appointments, infusions, lab work, procedures, you name it.
Breaching the subject with a boss or superior
Much like the stress surrounding when to tell a love interest about your health conditions, knowing when to the tell a boss you have IBD can be worrisome as well.
Here are Molly’s tips for approaching the subject:
Unless an emergency is forcing you to disclose your condition, I recommend sharing when you feel comfortable to do so.
Begin by asking if they know what your condition is “Have you ever heard of IBD? Do you know what IBD is?”
Based on their answer, follow-up with education and explaining how your condition impacts your life.
A good supervisor will ask you how they can support you. Be prepared to ask them for what you need which might be a flexible schedule or understanding that your illness is invisible, and you are in fact a motivated and loyal employee.
Sharing is not for everyone, but you might be surprised who else at work is dealing with a chronic illness, bosses included.
IBD Wins in the Working World
*Having bosses who support you personally and professionally lowers stress which supports optimizing mental and physical health.
*Finding ways to unwind—whether it’s exercising, taking Epsom salt baths, or going to therapy.
*Use each professional experience to help shed light on where your passions lie. You’re constantly learning what you like, what you don’t like, and each experience helps to inform the direction your career will take.
*Celebrate all the wins—large and small.
*Be mindful of how your employer handles a hospitalization, flare up, or surgery. It’s telling to see how your work family supports you or doesn’t in times of need. Your health should always be the top priority.
*While chronic illness may hijack where you thought you would be in your career, it may help dictate what you enjoy doing.
“As chronically ill workers we need to voice our needs and push for systems to change so that we can break down barriers, make working more accessible to the chronic illness community, and to obtain and retain talented chronic illness employees.”
Key Takeaways
It won’t be easy, but you can do it!
Feel empowered to stand up for yourself.
You deserve to be accommodated in the workplace and it is not a weakness to have a disability or need special needs.
Chronically ill people belong in the workforce.
You can still achieve your dreams after diagnosis, they might just look different.
Your career path might not go according to plan, and that is ok.
Follow your passion and heart whenever possible.
Working full time isn’t the answer for everyone.
Give yourself grace.
No job is worth your health.
If a job is making you sicker due to stress, toxic environment, or lack of flexibility, work towards changing that situation.
Your aspirations, dreams, goals, and plans will shift over time. Honor where you are and how far you have come!
‘Hello darkness, my old friend. I’ve come to talk with you again’. Ahh, the dreaded annual, routine, colonoscopy. I got a little spoiled because my last scope was July 2019. I decided to hold off in the thick of the pandemic out of safety concerns and did a fecal calprotectin test instead. Then, I got pregnant…so I had quite the enjoyable hiatus.
This time around, I decided to try SUTAB, a 24-pill prep + Magnesium citrate, rather than my typical Miralax-Dulcolax-Magnesium citrate. Without insurance and utilizing the patient savings card that’s online, SUTAB can be costly. I went here and printed out a coupon, I was able to get it from the CVS Pharmacy in Target for $50. While it’s more expensive than most preps, to me, it was worth the try.
Thoughts on doing a pill prep
So, this entire experience was a bit complicated for me. The night before my scope, I was miserable from the Magnesium citrate and the initial 12 pills. First off, I’ve come to learn that most GI’s do not make you take magnesium citrate on top of the typical prep. I’m just one of the lucky ones. Magnesium Citrate has always made me vomit, even if I take Zofran before. Prior to this prep, I always did the lemon flavor. I switched to the cherry flavor this time, GAME CHANGER. I had no problem getting it down…but it only stayed down for about an hour or so.
I threw up an unbelievable amount multiple times and never had a bowel movement. After not eating a solid meal for three days I was anxious and worried that I wouldn’t be cleaned out enough and that I was going through this hell for nothing. Sadly, Reid and Sophia witnessed it all go down and it broke my heart that they had to see me so sick and weak on the bathroom floor.
I relied on many members of the IBD community and medical professionals on social media to help guide me through the unknown. I took a Zofran and went to bed. I never woke to use the bathroom. I set my alarm for 3 a.m., took another Zofran, did NOT take the second 10 ounces of Magnesium citrate, and timed the remaining 12 pills every 3 minutes (rather than taking them back-to-back). I found that tip on Twitter and it made a huge difference! I decided not to take the second bottle of Magnesium citrate because in the medical instructions from the SUTAB box it says *not* to take any additional laxatives.
My scope was scheduled for 8:30 in the morning. I finished the pill prep at 4 a.m. and between then and 6:45 a.m. when we got on the road to hospital, I got completely cleaned out. I didn’t get nauseas, and everything fell into place. Now, I credit this with the fact I barely had anything in my body, which makes the prep much easier in my opinion.
If you would have asked me my thoughts on SUTAB vs. my typical go-to, Miralax + Dulcolax + Magnesium citrate the eve of the scope, I would have told you I would never do a pill prep, again. But once I took the Zofran, didn’t take the Magnesium citrate, and timed out the pills, only having to chase with pure water was amazing and very simple. All you have to do is drink 16 ounces of water with the 12 pills, and then an additional 32 ounces of water spaced out after. You can have more water if you want it.
My mom was laughing because she was watching me do multiple loads of laundry, make my son’s school lunch, pump milk for my 4-month-old, shower and get dressed…all on 4 hours of sleep, while in the middle of colonoscopy prep. As an IBD mom, I felt empowered in that moment of all I was capable of doing in the midst of what previously had been a nightmare.
Unfortunately, what is generally the “easy” part of the process—the hospital portion and the actual scope was very emotional and painful for me. My GI had ordered my usual routine labs to be drawn through my IV (to try and save me a trip) but I was so dehydrated from the prep and breastfeeding that the nurses could not get any blood. It took sticking me 8 different times. I felt like a human pin cushion. The IV was placed in a very tiny vein in my hand and the Propofol burned SO badly going in that I almost couldn’t handle it.
I kept asking for my husband Bobby to be allowed in recovery and felt like no one was listening to me. The nurse was gruff and kept poking me, even after I told her I would just go to a lab this week once I was hydrated. The blood pressure cuff even bruised my arm. I cried a lot of tears and the experience brought me back to a traumatic 2008 hospitalization for an abscess in my small intestine that involved 8 tries to get an IV.
My recommendation—do NOT allow labs to be drawn after you are done prepping for a scope. Save yourself the pain and the prodding. I overhead the nurses talking (outside the curtain) of my “room” saying they refuse to ever do this again to a patient and that we should all just go to labs to get bloodwork, rather than trying to get it done when we’re all terribly dehydrated. I had so many band-aids and gauze all over both my hands and arms, the nurses even sent me home with more gauze and band-aids in case I bled in the car. Fun times.
The best news
Luckily, the heaviness of this entire ordeal lifted a bit when my GI walked into the recovery room and said, “your small bowel and colon could not be more gorgeous. It was so pretty in there!” Best compliment you can give a gal with IBD!
She said even my anastomosis site (where my large and small intestine were reattached in 2015) …looked perfect. She explained how ulcers develop and indicate lack of blood flow. No ulcers, mucosal healing, and no biopsies needed. I feel incredibly fortunate that I have been lucky enough to hold onto my remission that came about because of my bowel resection surgery in August 2015.
I understand that “remission” is a complicated term in the IBD world. It doesn’t mean symptom-free, it doesn’t mean a cure…to me, it means I have many more days that I feel well than when I don’t. It means my Crohn’s disease doesn’t have to dictate or rule my life and that I’m able to be present for my family and for myself. It’s knowing that remission can go away in the blink of an eye. It’s happened to me before, and I know it will happen again. But for now, I’ll take a deep breath and enjoy this reprieve from the havoc I know my disease is capable of causing and continue to do all I can to stay well by staying on my biologic, keeping tabs on my lab work, and checking in with my GI whenever I feel like something may be starting to go awry. Remission is not something to be taken for granted. I often get asked what I do to “stay” in remission, I honestly don’t feel like I deserve much of the credit other than being a compliant patient and being very in-tune to how my body speaks to me through symptoms.
Moments that helped me get through
When my kids kept bringing me play food to help me feel better when they realized I couldn’t eat “real food” all week.
How my mom flew in from Chicago to help with the kids and to be an added support (like she does for every scope, procedure, and hospitalization).
When my husband, Bobby, came home late from work and rather than sitting at the kitchen table to eat, I caught him standing at the sink with his dinner plate and back turned so he wouldn’t be eating in front of me.
Knowing I was going to have a breakfast date with Bobby at our favorite spot and keeping my eye on the prize after going so many days without eating solid food.
Using my frozen breastmilk stash the day before and day-of the procedure to ease the burden of having to use energy and my body to feed Connor.
Reading all the comments on Instagram and hearing from friends and family near and far over text message and through phone calls really helped lift my spirits and conquer this as an exclusively breastfeeding mama.
Long story short—Aside from checking with your GI and getting a prescription for SUTAB, I would recommend trying the pill prep and from a patient perspective remind you to do the following:
Have your GI provide you with a prescription of Zofran (if you don’t have one already).
Take Zofran 30 minutes prior to taking the pills.
Set a timer on your phone and take one pill every three minutes.
While the pills are large, they are no bigger than a Prenatal vitamin and are doable.
For my self-imposed liquid diet this is how I plan it out for a Friday morning scope:
Last solid meal Monday evening
Tuesday-Wednesday full liquids
Thursday-Friday am clear liquids…and don’t forget my favorite tip of all…GUMMY BEARS! They are considered clear liquids, just steer clear from the red and purple ones.
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