When it comes to life, I often say I don’t believe in happenstance. Meaning, I believe everything happens for a reason. This rings true with one of my closest friendships. Stephanie and I were random roommates freshman year of college and had an instant connection. 
We ended up living together throughout our entire college experience, stood up in each other’s weddings and have managed to stay very close, despite thousands of miles between us since graduation.
On college graduation day in May 2005, I aspired to be a TV journalist. She had dreams of being a Physician Assistant. Both of us accomplished those goals—what we didn’t see coming was that we would both be diagnosed with inflammatory bowel disease in the years ahead (the first and only people in both our families)—me with Crohn’s in July 2005, her with ulcerative colitis in February 2009. She was working as a Physician Assistant in Family Practice when her symptoms developed. She knew the pain and bathroom habits were not normal.
Stephanie recalls, “Once I admitted to myself these symptoms weren’t going to go away, I reached out to the doctor that I was working for at the time. He contacted the GI Doc we referred all of our IBD patients to, and he got the ball rolling toward a diagnosis pretty fast! When the GI walked in the room after my colonoscopy with a solemn look on his face and just shook his head, I was devastated. 
I teared up. I was so fearful of the unknown, as far as what this is going to mean for me for the rest of my life. There is such a variation in the way patients with IBD can experience the disease… my mind immediately went to worst case scenario for myself.”
Stephanie’s journey with IBD and motherhood is one that is sure to inspire and provide hope to many. Along with juggling chronic illness, she also dealt with another devastating hurdle, infertility. Luckily, once she became pregnant through IVF, her ulcerative colitis symptoms were silenced.
“It was never far from my mind that while I was not pregnant, my uc was waiting quietly, like a ticking time bomb ready to go off, and that would then halt all the time, money and effort we were putting into getting pregnant. But, thankfully my uc behaved itself. We got pregnant on our first round of IVF with triplets (identical girls and a boy) who are happy, healthy and my entire world!”
Today, Stephanie and her husband have beautiful triplets who just started kindergarten. To take on IBD is one thing—add triplets to the mix… amazing! 
“I’ve had IBD since day one of being a mom, so I don’t know any different! Just like when people ask me “What’s it like to have triplets?” my response is usually “It’s all I know, I didn’t have a singleton before my triplets, so this is the way I know how to be a mom!” For obvious reasons having IBD sometimes makes our mom responsibilities a little bit more challenging, but you have to figure it out and take the good days with the bad, because your kids need you!”
Stephanie says since having her kids, she’s noticed she’s much more willing to “wave the white flag” and reach out to her GI sooner when things start to go south. 
She used to ride out the symptoms much longer before admitting there was a change that needed to be addressed, mostly because she was fearful of having to go back on steroids. I can attest to being the same way. Prior to becoming a mom, I waited until going to the emergency room was the only option. Now, I am more mindful of listening to my body and nipping flares in the bud, because my family needs me.
“Having a chronic disease definitely gives you a new perspective. It makes you appreciate the good days so much more! And when the not so good days creep up on you, having a good support system to help you physically and emotionally is crucial! Thank those in your life who lift you up and let them know you appreciate them! When you overcome each and every not so good day, 
it makes you feel just a little bit stronger and gives you the confidence that you can handle the curveballs life is bound to throw at you over and over!”
Beyond grateful to call this fellow IBD warrior mama one of my dearest friends. I’m sure after reading about her journey, you can see why.
When I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease at age 21, a month before my 22nd birthday—life had so many unknowns. I bottled up a lot of fears about how my life story would unfold and if I would be able to accomplish the hopes and dreams I had thought were a given.
It’s a path that will bring you heartache. Significant others will let you down—you’ll be disheartened when they fail to show up when you need them most…but, then it will happen. You will meet the person who was meant to fight this fight beside you. You’ll know. You’ll see how that person loves you unconditionally and even more so, because of your illness. They will see you as so much more—see yourself the way they see you. Not some sick person. A person who has a sickness that is part of them, but far from all of them.
Don’t allow this illness to make you think you aren’t capable—because you are. You will surprise yourself, if you continue to be positive and find alternative ways to make your dreams become your reality. I know you’re sitting there with your huge spreadsheet of 200 U.S. cities, wondering which TV station you’ll be able to work at…and if your journalism career will ever happen. Looking back—I’m so proud of you for continuing that job search amidst your very first flare. Looking for jobs across the country, as you swallowed 22 pills a day, grappled with a chronic illness diagnosis and dealt with all the side effects and pain that is Crohn’s. Work ethic and attitude will take you far with this disease. 
You will shine under those bright studio lights.
That first CT scan, that first colonoscopy, that first surgery, that first injection…it’s a lot to deal with. You’ll shake like a leaf and then as time goes on—you won’t bat an eye. You will find a strength within yourself that you never knew was there. You’ll be a seasoned warrior in no time.
You’ll do all these things. All with your sidekick—your enemy, but also your ally, Crohn’s. The one thing that really sets you apart. In the future you won’t keep your disease a secret, rather it will come up in conversations almost immediately, with a sense of confidence. A badge of honor. Yes, I have Crohn’s. Yes, it’s not ideal. But, yes…it’s made me sort of a bad ass. I’ve been through a lot. I haven’t backed down. And there’s so much life left to live. 
I like to take 2-3 extra days of daily medications and vitamins. Along with the daily dose, pack pain and allergy medications so you have it on hand and readily available, should you need it. As someone who battles Crohn’s disease, I’ve had to fly out of the country with my biologic injection. Be mindful of how your medication needs to be stored. If it needs to stay cool, keep it within a zipped-up bag with an ice pack and remember to throw in a few alcohol swabs for good measure. Also, keep your medication on you at all times, never in a checked bag!
Whether it’s a business card or information that’s stored in your phone—make sure you have your doctor’s phone number readily available, should an emergency or flare up arise. It’s also helpful to keep a list of medications in your purse or wallet, so that you don’t have to worry about remembering the dosage you take or what you are on, should an emergency arise.
it will help you feel your best and enjoy your trip. Pack a thermos or water bottle, and it’s as easy as using a water fountain or grabbing some bottled water and mixing up DripDrop on the go. This way—you can enjoy the sun and warm temperatures and keep your body on track for feeling its best.
There aren’t a whole lot of “safe spaces” for those of us to feel understood and connected with.
As someone who’s battled Crohn’s disease for over 13 years, I constantly find myself needing to take a step back and remember that the only person who’s lived my journey is me. It’s up for me to tell my story. It’s up for me to share it. It’s up to me to communicate to those when my feelings are hurt or I’m disappointed. But before I jump to conclusions, I need to assume the other person is trying to help me or learn more about my experience—rather than ruin my day or hurt my feelings. API all day, baby. Try it. Trust it. Live it.
Everyone works together to watch me, the baby and the pregnancy every step of the way. We get an ultrasound once a month! I see that as a perk!
I don’t know what it is about July, but that’s always been my danger zone. I always breathe a sigh of relief when August begins. Call me superstitious, but prior to getting married, I knew I could never have my wedding this month nor would I want to welcome a baby into the world. I have July’s number.
nip it in the bud. Don’t try and be a superhero and take on a flare yourself or fail to communicate to those around you. You and I both know exactly how it feels when a trip to the hospital is a must. Delaying the inevitable will only add insult to injury. Stay on top of maintenance medication, vitamins, exercise and sleep.
She’s a resilient person with a positive attitude. Her energy is contagious. This week, a guest post about her involvement with 
I saw a post on Facebook about 
I’ve also been blessed with a beautiful wife and life partner, as well as four amazing children (10, 7, 3, and 9 months). This takes an already difficult situation, and adds more “life” responsibility as well. 
Take the time to get to know a father with IBD, and you will meet one of the most courageous strong willed people in the community. As a man, we can sometimes let ourselves down because as an individual, it just impacts me. But as a father, that is not an option. We must persist, have faith, and fight the fights every single day, so that we can continue to mold and shape our children, and provide support and guidance for our families that mean absolutely everything to us. 
The excitement of knowing “I’m not a hypochondriac” was overshadowed by the fear of having a “poop disease”. You see, my first year of college, I became best friends with my Suite mate. Ironically, she too battles Crohn’s. I was 20 years old, diagnosed with a disease that had no cause and therefore no cure…how can that be? Why me? What am I going to do? I didn’t even know how to swallow a pill. I was never the sick kid! Now, I had to take 24 pills a day, which sometimes would take me an entire hour to swallow one dose, throw up, re-swallow again. Three times a day. It was as if I had entered “hell”.
Which made my journey with the disease a little different than today. I was raised to think “only the weak complain!” “Someone always has it worse!” “Suck it up butter cup”. “If you want the job done right, do it yourself”. This made me look at the situation as this was “my” disease, “my” problem and I don’t want to make anyone worry about me or feel sorry for me! I became a master at hiding the disease and a master at hiding the byproducts of the disease.
I’m a proud mother to two amazing children. I carried and gave birth to both of them with zero complications. I’m a business owner of a successful insurance agency, which I established 4 years after diagnosis. I didn’t allow my disease to derail my professional aspirations. I’m an active mother and manage to find time to be a room mother and Girl Scout cookie manager.
“You’re an incredible partner—you’re my rock when I’m sick and you know how to lift my spirits when I’m down. You have a way of easing my worries and bringing me clarity when I’m uncertain. Each day spent with you—is an extraordinary blessing. I feel so incredibly lucky that God brought us together and chose you to be the one person among millions who lights up my soul.”
At times, living with a chronic illness and being the one who doesn’t feel well, can bring about guilt. It also brings out the best in us. When I’m vulnerable and need a boost, I see my husband rise up to the challenge, time and time again. I’m constantly reminded I chose to live my life alongside someone who has more compassion in their heart than I knew imaginable.
