Summer is officially here and while the sun and break from school and a routine is welcomed by many, the shift in schedules can be a struggle for parents with chronic illness. As a mom with Crohn’s disease with kids ages 7, 5, and almost 3, some days are easier than others on me. Even though I’ve been a stay-at-home mom and freelancer since my first child was born in March 2017, it’s a lot to juggle when every day can feel like Groundhog Day and when you get little to no breaks from mom or dad life. This week on Lights, Camera, Crohn’s some tips for navigating the summer months, when school is out and everyone is home, looking to be entertained and fed snacks around the clock.

Dealing with the unique challenges

Mom and Dad guilt can feel like it’s reaching epic proportions when you go on social media as a chronic illness parent and see all the daily adventures and trips other families are posting about. When fighting fatigue and coping with pain, making those efforts with kids can feel like an uphill battle. You want to be present and do all the things and make all the core memories, but it can be extremely difficult and exhausting physically and emotionally when you aren’t feeling well and trying to do it all in the heat of summer. The combination of managing a chronic illness and the increased demands of having children home from school can be overwhelming. However, with some careful planning and strategies, IBD parents can navigate the summer months more smoothly.

I try and remind myself that whether we have an adventure-filled day or a day at home playing in the backyard and having popsicles, my kids are having fun. It’s ok to have an “old-fashioned” summer, hanging out with the neighborhood kids and playing outside. Now that my youngest is about to turn 3 in July, I feel like I’m in a sweet spot this summer where I don’t need to lug the stroller and a diaper bag everywhere we go.

Tips for Managing IBD During Summer

Plan Ahead:

1. Summer Camps: Prior to summer and even during, I try and sign up my older two for camps and activities that I think they’ll enjoy. So far this summer, my kids have done soccer camps, volleyball camp, dance camp, and Vacation Bible School. Most of the camps are only 2-4 hours, but even having one child entertained helps ease the dynamic back at home. At the same time, I try not to overschedule camps, because it can be stressful to try and get everyone out of the house by 8 am and all the drop-offs and pick-ups can make some days stressful and overbooked. There’s a delicate balance!
2. Activities: Choose activities that align with your energy levels. Opt for outings that require less physical exertion or allow for breaks. Having a game plan ahead of time, and keeping it to yourself rather than getting your kids excited and then not being able to deliver on the promise is key.
3. Backup Plans: Have a backup plan for days when your symptoms are more severe. This could include indoor activities, quiet time, or arranging for help from friends or family.

Communicate with Your Children:

1. Honesty: Age-appropriate honesty about your condition can help children understand your limitations. Explain why you may need to rest or take breaks.
2. Involvement: Involve older children in planning activities and chores. This can lighten your load and teach them responsibility.

Create a Support System:

1. Family and Friends: Don’t hesitate to ask for help. Whether it’s babysitting, meal preparation, or just lending an ear, a support system is crucial. I find it a lot easier when I go on playdates with other moms and my kids can be entertained with their kids. Having downtime to talk with adults (or even be out of the house and in the same vicinity as other moms and dads) is a breath of fresh air. I’ve even see moms post about simply going for a drive to get everyone out of the house.
2. IBD Community: Connect with other IBD parents through support groups or online forums. There’s solidarity and understanding on social media and so many people living your reality. While summer is fun, it’s also a lot to get acclimated to when you are used to having children in school.

Utilize Resources:

1. Apps and Tools: Use health management apps to track symptoms, medication, and appointments. Parenting apps can help organize activities and chores. Chances are there are people in your town or city with accounts that highlight the best parks, pools, and activities to check out in the summer months. I follow a bunch of St. Louis parenting accounts and save or screenshot reels or posts so I have ideas of places I can take my kids that are “mom-approved”.
2. Professional Help: Don’t hesitate to consult your healthcare provider for advice on managing IBD during the summer. They may suggest adjustments to your treatment plan.

Prioritize Self-Care:

1. Rest: Make time for rest even amidst the chaos of summer activities. Create a schedule that includes downtime to help manage fatigue and reduce stress.
2. Diet: Stick to a diet that works for you. Avoid foods that trigger flare-ups, and keep healthy snacks readily available.
3. Hydration: Summer heat can exacerbate IBD symptoms. Drink plenty of water to stay hydrated. I never leave home without water for myself and my kids.
4. Stay on top of your health: Summer is not a break from doctor appointments, lab work, scans and scopes. Make sure you don’t let your IBD management go by the wayside. Unfortunately, we can never take a break or vacation from keeping tabs on our disease.

Activities and Coping Strategies

Indoor Activities:

1. Crafts and Games: Keep a stash of craft supplies and board games for days when going out isn’t feasible. Some days it’s just too hot to go outside. Hitting up the DollarStore or Hobby Lobby can be helpful for picking up easy crafts when you’re in a pinch.
2. Reading and Movies: Create a cozy reading nook or have a movie marathon with your kids. It’s ok to have slow, snuggle days. I try not to beat myself up about screen time when I’m feeling overwhelmed or need a chance to breathe. A trip to the library with the kids is always a nice reprieve from the heat and then you can return home, snuggle and read together.

Outdoor Fun:

1. Parks and Beaches: Choose locations with amenities like bathrooms and shaded areas. Bring a comfortable chair or blanket to rest. I love packing lunches or picking up food on the way to the park and having a picnic with my kids. I also brought one of those trendy snack containers off Amazon with the different dividers for snacks, and that’s a great way to save on having to buy food while you’re out and about. Splash pads are also great so that kids can burn off energy and get refreshed, without you having to keep a close eye with them in a pool or having to get in yourself.

Mindfulness and Relaxation:

1. Yoga, Meditation, and walks: Incorporate gentle yoga or meditation into your routine. These practices can help manage stress and improve overall well-being. After dinner, when the temperatures begin to drop, it’s a great time to take a solo walk outside, if your partner can stay back with the kids or ask friends to join you. It’s nice to decompress and get steps in, without having to deal with the sweltering sun.
2. Quiet Time: Speaking of quiet time for you, establish a daily quiet time where everyone in the household engages in calm activities, giving you a chance to recharge. It’s difficult for me to find quiet time these days, but I try and decompress after bedtime at least.

Final thoughts

Managing IBD while parenting during the summer requires a blend of planning, self-care, and support. By prioritizing your health and setting realistic expectations, you can create a summer that is enjoyable for both you and your children. Remember, taking care of yourself is not only beneficial for you but also sets a positive example for your kids. In moments of high stress, where my kids are not getting along, I try and remind myself that someday I’ll look back on these times as the good old days.